When You Should NOT Go Out to a Restaurant

I’ve been inspired by my friend Tiffany to do a public service announcement. She also works in a restaurant (in another state). She has, on a number of occasions, written on her blog about actions that are NOT acceptable behavior in a restaurant. So here’s one from me.

If you are not able to control your kids, do NOT take them to a restaurant. The restaurant is not a playground for your kids. The staff are not baby sitters for you kids. You should not let you kids run around the restaurant, up and down the stairs, too and from the bathroom. They should not be left to stand in the middle of the doorway to the kitchen so that everybody has to walk around them. If they cannot sit for 1 hour while you eat: 1 eat faster, 2. go to McDonalds, 3. don’t go out. I would rather not have your sad measly tip then wait on your unruly kids!

If you hate your kids or they are giving you a headache, you should NOT go out to a restaurant. I don’t want to have a headache from your kids either. I also don’t need your crappy, rude attitude that you bring along with your headache from your misbehaving kids.

I am your waiter. I am there to bring you stuff that you ask for. So when I come and ask if you are ready or if I can help you decide, you can answer: yes or no. However yelling NO!! is not an acceptable response.

If you are too stupid to read the whole flyer, and miss the writing 4 inches below the list of happy hour specials that says that you have to be at the bar for them. And then your waiter goes to the manager and convinces him to make and exception this once. Then you should say thank you, Pete for saving me $3. You should not get more upset when I explain to you that I saved you the measly $3, you should SHUT YOUR MOUTH.

Also I understand that some waiters/waitresses are rude. They give the good ones a bad name. But unless they laughed when they dropped your food on your lap, then keep your mouth shut when you leave and see their manager. You should definitely not complain to the manager when your waiter got you the $3 off your meal (even though you are too stupid to read the flyer and don’t really deserve it but he has been working all day and just wants you to shut up). And if you are too stupid to tell the difference between yourself and the waiter (meaning that you were rude the whole time and the waiter wasn’t ever rude) you should NOT tell the manager that the waiter was rude.

I hope that someone has found this educational. If I’ve helped even one waiter/waitress, then it was worth it.

This was somewhat cathartic. I’ll have to do more posts like this. Thanks for the inspiration Tiff.